The Gothenburger Blog




Smoking in Gothenburg

I once was in a swedish radio show to tell them about my worse “new year’s promise“. I think mine was when I one new year’s eve promised that I would start smoking.

But now, I realise that I could never do so. I have tried and tried and tried, but I can´t stop coughing!! I suck at this. And now my question is; where do I put all the practice ciggarette-ends? I guess we don’t have and recycling stations for those things around here in Gothenburg?

I guess I can sell them as full size cigarrs to dwarfs?

I guess I can sell them as full size cigars to dwarfs?

Henrik the Gothenburger

In Sweden, we call those fimp (sing.) and fimpar (pl.)

In Sweden, we call those "fimp" (sing.) and "fimpar" (pl.) Funny, eh?

Bad glue method from Gothenburg

Out of glue?

Gothenburg sealing method that sucks

I went to my brother´s birthday party yesterday. As usual, I didn´t have time to even wrap his present in toilet paper, so I just left it in the plastic H&M bag. But I wanted to do SOMETHING so it would look more like a “real” present, so I just used my chewing gum to seal it. It didn´t work. I don´t know if this is the way we usually do it here in Gothenburg.

gothenburg,sweden,present,brother,glue,chewing gum

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Playing the guitar unarmed

Don’t shoot!

-I’m unarmed! And I’m playing the guitarr!

This is so cool. The guy´s name is Tony Melendez and he learned how to play the guitar at 16.

Clumsy story no. 1

Clumsy story no. 1

– I felt very attached to my car

One sunny day I was going to give my friend Settie (her real name is Setareh, that is “star” in persian, but nevermind). I borrowed my stepmother’s SAAB 9-5 and in those cars the controllers to the power windows is placed in the middle, between the front seats. Anyhow, the nail on my longest right hand finger was a bit long, so I started to bit it of, while I was standing at the traffic lights waiting for it to turn green. Suddenly I succeeded biting the nail off, so with my left hand, I pushed the power window button down. I hung out my right hand and tried to shake the nail of, but it was stuck in saliva!

As I was standing first in the car que I sort of got panic when the lights suddenly turned into green! By some reason, my brain doesn´t communicate good enough with the rest of my body in panic situations, so guess what – my LEFT hand went down as a falcon, and landed on the power window button! Of course my right hand got stuck as the window went up again. But it doesn´t stop here – then the left hand (I have no control any longer, I just observe my different bodyparts living their own life) goes down AGAIN and violently press the gear stick in the first gear position, and the car starts to move (body parts conspiracy). I actually manage to change to the second gear, before the left hand decided to free his stucked friend loose.

The funniest thing was that when Settie saw my red, struggeling hand out the window as my car accelerated away, she just waved back…

An angry note

Angry note

that didn’t make any sense

My wife accidently came on the wrong side the deadline in the laundry room today. As soon as she realized this terrible mistake, she ran down. But she wasn´t fast enough; the next person to do their laundry had already put up a note. It said:

“Why did you take my laundry time? Can´t you read? Get your clothes out of there in 30 minutes!”

My first (and actually only question) was; if you assume that somebody can´t read, but you want to let this person know something, why the hell do you write them a note for?! But I guess when you’re already at it, why don´t you just call them and ask them if they are deaf aswell?

I guess I´ll never know.

My way back home

Sparkling beer

– at l’assassino on the Second Long Street in Gothenburg

I was a little bit drunk tonight, since it was my birthday. It was very funny. But I was not THAT drunk. Another time, when I was THAT drunk, I couldn’t even remember my address, so I asked the taxi driver to drive me to a candy store nearby. From that candy store I found my way back home. That’s some kind of humour, I guess.

Btw, I went to l’assassasino, my favourite bar, and I managed to get a BEER with a sparkler in it! After all, it was my birthday…


I almost got that sparkling thing in my eye!

Oh, it’s my birthday!

Henrik’s birthday

– some people doesn’t change a bit. I am NOT one of those.

Well, it has happened; I am 34 years old today. I have no particular feeling about it, just that the day has been rushing away. Tomorrow we celebrate Midsummer’s Eve here in Sweden, so I guess I will take it easy today.

By the way, what happened the last 16 years??



Henrik the Gothenburger


2008 - what happened!?

Well, guess it could have been worse!

PS: My grandmother just called. She does that every year, to sing for me. This time it sounded something like this:

“I hope you will live
I hope you will live
I hope you will live for a hundred years
Then I will shoot you in the butt
when you are hundred years old”

She’s from Saaremaa outside Estonia, of course she have to shoot somebody! 😀

Oh, by the way; thank you SO much for all greetings I received at facebook!! I really appreciate it!

My sexy wife’s g-string

Sexy wife

– but I’m not sure it’s thanks to the over sized g-string?

It´s amazing how long my wife’s g-string is!

The longer, the sexier? No?


Unfortenately, no-one from The Guinness Book of Records passed by right then to document the g-string.

SAAB advanced eco driving

Gothenburger ECO driving

– sometimes things don’t have to be that complicated

I borrowed a SAAB BioPower from my dad the other day, and since it was the first time I ever drove a “eco car” I had now idea how it worked. The first thing I noticed as I start driving, was that the accelerator pedal was VERY sluggish; I really had to use my leg muscles to get it down. “Oh, so that´s how it works“, I said to myself. So I drove around for about an hour, thinking that it was a good thing to make the accelerator pedal very slow. That way, you can´t rush the engine and accelerat realy quick!

Something with the BioPowered SAAB was not feeling right

But after a while I got tired of behing SO slow at the red lights, so I called my brother (who I knew had been driving those eco cars before) and asked him how I could turn this “slow accelerator pedal”-function off. He was confused. Then he said “well, it works like an ordinary car. But into this car, you can put another type of fuel“. Now I was confused too. Then I reminded myself of my old Chevy Nova. The floor carpet was sometimes sliding up, under the accelerator pedal. So I looked down. And do you know for how long I laughed, VERY hard? If you do, please tell me, I have no idea.


This is a very cheap way to make your car more economic to drive!

Hey! My first post!

The Gothenburger Blog

– now you have one more blogg to ignore!

At last! From now on, some of my swedish blog posts will be translated into english. I will not write very much right now. Hope you will enjoy it!

How about some stand up comedy stuff?
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